Over two hours with The Father … The Holy Father

Pope Francis invited a small group of leaders from various backgrounds, both Catholic, Pentecostals and non clerical leaders from Poland, Latvia, Scotland and Italy. As founder of the Tato.Net community the time spent here was a groundbreaking and powerful lesson of responsible and mature fatherhood.

Having had lunch which was served in the Vatican restaurant, I was surprised to find the Pope already waiting to greet us in the hall 15 minutes before the appointed time. The meeting setup itself was equally surprising. The Pope had not planned a speech, instead he created space for dialogue and active mutual listening. He wanted to get to know us and to accommodate our questions and cares. An experienced reporter from the Vatican Radio was very surprised by the length of the meeting. He claimed that meetings with heads of states and diplomats are not always granted and if they are, they usually last about 15 minutes. 

It is true that Francis is the leader of the Roman Catholic Church, the head of the Vatican state, but he also came across as being a close Dad, Father. Francis is showing us that what is most important (in fatherhood too) occurs during a meeting.

The challenge of semi orphanism and soft culture

In answer to my question the Pope started a discussion about the problem of orphanism in relation to the lack of fathers and the widespread fatherhood crisis. The absence of fathers destroys the structure of the modern family and results in painful mass trauma. He claimed that in a world where everything is becoming ‘soft’ (soft and relative), there is little room for heritage which is endowed by fathers. The Pope also encouraged to strengthen the role of grandfathers and indicated that their role was indispensable in terms of dialogue with the younger generation.

A lesson of fatherly imagination and courage

The meeting with Pope Francis opened my eyes to the role of the father who has the ability to heal wounds. He upholds law and order but is not legalistic, someone who clings to the letter of the law.  He is equipped with compassion and courage which allow him to ask for forgiveness when the need arises. That’s exactly the fatherly heart which Francis has, a person fulfilling the mission of reconciliation.

The memories of grievances, pain and conflicts are sometimes stored up for many years in families. In a similar way this can occur in religious or national communities. Without fatherly leadership these communities cannot overcome divisions from the past. At the Vatican I was able to listen to the testimony of pastor Giovanni Traettino from a small Italian family of Pentecostal Christians. Many years ago that group had been harmed by Catholics. Francis was the first Pope who passed the threshold of the Pentecostal Church and sincerely asked for forgiveness for harm committed by members of his own religious community.

A father’s good word makes a difference

Francis knows how to decode important but non-understandable words like ‘ fatherly blessing’. He claims that unity and blessings are present whenever we don’t talk or think badly about others. We do not make fun of those who behave differently from us. It is good when a father makes the sign of the cross on a child’s forehead or when he makes a different symbolic gesture however, we can also bless our children with a good word and thought. 

To bless is a fatherly activity which amounts to being less strict and more inclined to saying a good word. This is the power of leadership through serving.